JACK THE GIANT SLAYER Trailer: Slay This Crap

Finally, a movie for that target demo of people who hate movies. 

I wonder if there's anyone who looks at this new trailer for Jack The Giant Slayer and gets actually excited. I don't mean interested in that way people have become programmed to be interested in every single big movie with enough oppressive FX and a couple of good, paycheck-snatching faces in the cast. I mean truly excited, like this is a movie they've been waiting for, or that this is a world into which they can't wait to escape. 

Because to me Jack The Giant Slayer looks like a nothing movie for nobody, a film that you'll stumble upon on HBO in a couple of years and say, 'Oh shit, Nicolas Hoult was in this one!' It seems designed to slide past your neurons, to be completely forgotten in time for home video in order to trick you into renting the Blu at Redbox.

Hey, maybe it's good. Maybe the giants are supposed to look absolutely awful and seem to have no physical relation to the spaces around them. Maybe I'm supposed to think 'Oh not this warmed over Lord of the Rings look AGAIN,' in order to be pleasantly surprised by something more interesting upon release. 

Probably not. It's probably exactly the hunk of obvious crap the trailer shows. But who knows!