Film Crit Hulk Smash: PREAMBLE TO SCREENWRITING 101

HEY FOLKS!

HULK SINCERELY HOPE THAT YOU'VE BEEN ENJOYING THE HULK STUFFS HERE ON BADASS THUS FAR. SOME OF YOU HAVE EVEN BEEN WRITING TO HULK WITH RATHER KIND WORDS AND SINCE MAMA-HULK RAISED HULK RIGHT, HULK JUST WANTED TO OFFER A DEEP BIT OF THANKS AND APPRECIATION. AMONG SOME OF THE COMMENTS, A GOOD DEAL OF YOU HAVE NOTICED THAT HULK NOT SO MUCH A "TRADITIONAL CRITIC" WHO REVIEWS MOVIES AND STUFF, BUT MORE A BIG GREEN GUY WHO DO JUST WRITES ESSAYS WITH MACRO/MICRO APPROACHES TO FILM AND CULTURE STUFFS. THIS IS MOSTLY BECAUSE THOSE KINDS OF DISCUSSIONS ARE WHAT HULK IS SIMPLY INTERESTED IT.

BUT ADMITTEDLY, IT ALSO HAS TO DO WITH HULK'S REAL LIFE WORK. NO, NOT THE TIMES HULK FIGHTS MEPHISTO AND THE LEADER TO TRY SAVE THE WORLD FROM CERTAIN DOOM, BUT THE OTHER REAL-LIFE WORK. THE  MOVIE/TV STUFF WHICH HULK HAS ALLUDED TO MANY TIMES.  WHILE HULK SORT OF WEAR MANY PROFESSIONAL HATS SO TO SPEAK, A GOOD PART OF HULK'S DAY INVOLVES BOTH READING A TON OF SCRIPTS AND WORKING ON HULK'S OWN CREATIVE PROJECTS.

NOW, HULK REALIZE THAT SOUNDS SORT OF NEBULOUS, BUT HULK APOLOGIZE. AND PLEASE KNOW THAT THIS IS NOT MEANT TO OVER-REPRESENT HULK-SELF AS SOME SORT OF "GRAND AUTHORITY" BY ANY STRETCH OF IMAGINATION, BECAUSE HULK WOULD BOW AT THE FEET OF THOUSANDS OF OTHER PEOPLE IN THIS AND EVERY CREATIVE INDUSTRY. WHAT THIS LITTLE INFORMATION IS MEANT TO ESTABLISH IS THAT HULK SIMPLY HAS ONE FOOT IN THE WORLD OF CREATING CONTENT AND THE OTHER FOOT BEING WITH YOU, HERE AND NOW... AND AS SUCH, MAYBE HULK CAN HELP.

AND SO, A BIG PART OF WHAT HULK WANT DO HERE AT BADASS IS TALK A LOT ABOUT THE PROCESS OF CREATING/ MAKING / APPROACHING MOVIES FROM CONCEPTUAL AND PRACTICAL STANDPOINTS. HULK FIRST DID THIS WITH THE ACTING 101 COLUMN  BUT NOW IT IS TIME TO DIP INTO WHAT IS PROBABLY HULK'S MOST KNOWLEDGEABLE ARENA AND DISCUSS THE FIELD OF SCREENWRITING. AGAIN, THIS IS NOT OVER-REPRESENT HULK-SELF AS SOME GRAND AUTHORITY, IT IS JUST THAT HULK GET SO MANY EMAILS FROM YOUNG WRITERS AND FILMMAKERS LOOKING FOR ADVICE. SO HONESTLY, HULK WANT NOTHING MORE THAN TO HELP AND FOR PEOPLE TO GO FORWARD MAKING THE BEST POSSIBLE FILMS.

THUS, HULK WILL BE RELEASING A SCREENWRITING 101 COLUMN THIS SUNDAY THAT HULK HOPES WILL DO JUST THAT.

WHICH MEANS THE LARGE QUESTION IS WHY THE HECK DID HULK BOTHER WRITING A PREAMBLE COLUMN FOR IT? WTF HULK?

THE REASON IS BECAUSE HULK HAS ALREADY TALKED ABOUT SOME WRITING CONCEPTS BEFORE. AND GOING INTO THE UPCOMING COLUMN HULK THOUGHT IT WOULD BE HIGHLY USEFUL TO READ A COUPLE OF OLD HULK ARTICLES BEFOREHAND. IT MAY SEEM SILLY TO LINK TO OLD ARTICLES IN PREP FOR A NEW ONE, BUT HULK SORT OF HAVE A MULTI-YEAR-PLAN FOR HOW TO BEST APPROACH OUR EVOLVING DISCUSSION OF THE MEDIUM. MULTI-YEAR???? YUP! IT'S KIND OF LIKE HOW THE WIRE WAS ALL PLANNED OUT, ONLY, YOU KNOW, THIS IS NOT EVEN CLOSE TO BEING THE BEST THING EVER.

SO THE FIRST ARTICLE HULK WANT POINT YOU TO IS THE MYTH OF 3 ACT STRUCTURE.

IN IT, HULK BASICALLY EXPLAINS THAT THE OH-SO-FAMOUS 3 ACT STRUCTURE OF STORYTELLING IS ESSENTIALLY A LOAD OF POOPY. IT WILL DO NOTHING BUT HELP YOU WRITE FORMULAIC, TRITE MOVIES WITH INSUFFERABLE, BACKWARDS APPROACHES TO STORY TELLING. THE WAY THEY HANDLE DEFINITIONS OF STRUCTURAL BREAKS AND "BEATS" IS, QUITE FRANKLY, NONSENSE. IT LEADS TO MOST OF 2ND ACT STANDING STALLING AND TERRIBLE ENDINGS YOU SEE IN MOST MOVIES. THUS, HULK PURPOSES ANY KIND OF MULTI-ACT ALTERNATIVES AND LOOKS TO SHAKESPEAREAN 5 ACT MODELS AS A BETTER GUIDE. REMEMBER YOU CAN HAVE ANY NUMBER OF "ACTS" IN A FILM THAT YOU WANT. BECAUSE AN ACT CAN BE ANYTHING AS LONG AS IT HAS CHARACTERS MAKING DECISIONS, FROM WHICH THEY OFTEN CANNOT GO BACK, WHICH THEN CREATE A SENSE OF NARRATIVE PROPULSION. BUT REALLY, THE ARTICLE ARTICULATES IT BETTER.

THE SECOND ARTICLE IS HULK EXPLAINS WHY WE SHOULD STOP IT WITH THE HERO JOURNEY SHIT.

THE MAIN REASON BOTH 3 ACT STRUCTURE AND THE HERO'S JOURNEY SUCK AS WRITING MODELS IS BECAUSE THEY ARE BOTH REDUCTIVE EVALUATIONS THAT HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THE PROCESS OF ORGANIC WRITING. THEY ARE BOTH DESIGNED TO REDUCE STORY POINTS TO THEIR MOST BASIC ELEMENTS, WHICH HAS A HUGE ANALYTICAL VALUE, BUT FOR ACTUALLY THEN TURNING AROUND AND WRITING FROM THAT MODEL? IT IS PURE ASS. THINK ABOUT IT. YOU ARE ONLY USING THE MOST REDUCED KINDS OF STORY MODEL, WHICH WILL ONLY MAKE YOUR STORY SEEM REDUCED TOO. HULK EXPLAINS IN THE COLUMNS HOW THEY ARE ESSENTIALLY PISS-POOR ATTEMPTS AT REVERSE ENGINEERING A STORY, WHICH IS SOMETHING YOU NEVER WHAT YOU WANT TO DO.

AND FOR PROOF? FORGIVE HULK FOR SOMEWHAT GLOATING LIKE THIS, BUT A READER POINTED OUT A CHRISTOPHER NOLAN VIDEO THAT ARTICULATED EXACTLY WHAT HULK FUCKING SAID IN THE COLUMN (WAIT FOR THE END. IT ONLY 2 MINUTES).

SO THOSE ARE THE TWO ARTICLES.

BUT THE LAST THING HULK GOING LINK TO LINK TO ISN'T SO MUCH ABOUT WRITING AND TOTALLY LESS-NECESSARY FOR THE UPCOMING COLUMN, BUT PERHAPS IT KIND OF RELEVANT IN THAT IT HAS TO DO WITH "VISUAL STORYTELLING." THE FOLLOWING LINKS ARE TO HULK'S 3 DAY SERIES OF ACTION ARTICLES WRITTEN WITH THE REMARKABLE TOM TOWNEND (THE CINEMATOGRAPHER ON ATTACK THE BLOCK!).

CHECK EM OUT. DAY 1.  DAY 2.  DAY 3. 

HULK THINK THEY REALLY TACKLE SOME GREAT ISSUES ABOUT HOW WE TEND TO MAKE ACTION SCENES THAT ARE THESE MEANINGLESS "COOL LOOKING" THINGS, BUT THAT IS A HUGE DISSERVICE TO THE AUDIENCE. ACTION SCENES SHOULD REALLY BE COMPLETE MINI-STORIES FULL OF CAUSE + EFFECT, OBJECTIVES, AND ACTUAL MEANING TO THE CHARACTERS. THEY SHOULD BE INVOLVING. THEY SHOULD BE VISUAL STORIES.

SO WHAT YOU MAY BE ABLE TO TELL FROM ALL OF THESE LINKED COLUMNS IS THAT A GOOD DEAL OF LEARNING HOW TO "WRITE" INVOLVES UNLEARNING A FEW BASIC TROPES OF HOW WE THINK WE TELL STORIES.

BUT THIS UNLEARNING IS ACTUALLY COMMON OF ALL LEARNING. THE EVOLUTION OF WHAT WE "KNOW" IN SCIENCE EVOLVES CONSTANTLY, BUT PERHAPS IT'S EVEN MORE SIMPLE THAN THAT. THINK ABOUT THE EXPLANATIONS OF HISTORY YOU LEARNED IN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL: COLUMBUS "DISCOVERING AMERICA," THE FIRST THANKSGIVING, WHY WE FOUGHT THE AMERICAN REVOLUTION... IN AN EFFORT TO EXPLAIN THINGS TO KIDS, WE SIMPLY CLUNG TO REDUCTIVE UNTRUTHS THAT LACKED THE NUANCE OF REAL UNDERSTANDING. AND SOME STILL CLING TO THEM.

SO WHAT HULK WOULD LIKE TO SUGGEST THAT MANY OF THE POPULAR WAYS WE EVALUATE SCREENWRITING AND STORYTELLING TODAY ARE JUST AS REDUCTIVE AS SAYING "COLUMBUS DISCOVERED AMERICA."

AND PERHAPS WE SHOULD TRY TO FIX THAT.

SO JOIN HULK AGAIN STARTING ON SUNDAY TO TALK MORE ABOUT WHAT MAKES A GOOD STORY / SCREENPLAY.

<3 HULK

ENDNOTE:

(1) NOW SOME MAY ARGUE THIS "FOOT IN BOTH WORLD" THING LENDS TO A LACK OF OBJECTIVITY, BUT HULK ARGUE NO, NOT REALLY. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE HULK TAKES THE CONCEPTUAL EVALUATIVE PATH HULK DOES. AND FOR THOSE CURIOUS, NO, HULK HAS STAYED MILES AWAY FROM ANYTHING THAT CAN EVEN REMOTELY BE CONSTRUED AS A CONFLICT OF INTEREST.