Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Dick Delays TERMINATOR 5

The former Governator puts his movie career on hold while he deals with a ten year old sex scandal. Really?

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Dick Delays TERMINATOR 5

In case you don’t follow the bullshit celeb gossip stuff, Arnold Schwarzenegger and his wife, Maria Shriver, split up last week. It seemed to me like just a case of finally ending a marriage that had been politically expedient, but shit got real this week when it was revealed that Arnie had a love child by the family’s fugly housekeeper. The love child is about ten years old.

Now Arnold has announced that he is putting his comeback on hold to deal with this decade old nonsense. “Gov. Schwarzenegger is focusing on personal matters and is not willing to commit to any production schedules or timelines,” said the statement. It specifically mentioned Cry Macho and Terminator 5.

What is this crap? Why do I care how many illegitimate sons this guy has? I want to see him in an ultra-violent R-rated action movie, not preaching family values. Does the fact that he schtupped the housekeeper make it difficult to watch him stick a shotgun up a guy’s asshole and pull the trigger? No, of course not.

In the grand scheme of things, though, none of this matters. This is a publicity stance, not a real world stance. What’s more, Terminator 5 doesn’t even have a script, so it isn’t like Arnold needs to get working on that film tomorrow or something.

Devin Faraci's photo About the Author: A ten year veteran of writing for the web, Devin has built a reputation as a loud, uncompromising and honest voice – sometimes to the chagrin of his readers, but usually to their delight.